Today is a day to honour all dads everywhere for a job well done.  A dad is something more than a mere sperm donor.  A Dad is someone who takes the time day in, and day out to spend time with their children, to really care what is happening in their lives, to make time for the little quality moments, and to help out their beloved wife from time to time.

I see my wonderful husband everyday making such an effort.  I must admit that I probably don’t tell him as often as I should what a great father he is.  However, he does know it I am sure since both my girls are Daddy’s girls and always call for their “Dada”. Yes, I am chop liver.

So, for the countless soccer games, T-ball games, diaper changes, temper tantrum diffusing episodes, time-out sessions, cleaning up the kitchen, doing arts & crafts, and playing cars or dolls —– THANKYOU.  For without you, where would us mom’s be?

Below is a poem which I thought fitting to honour Dads everywhere.  We love you!!!!

What Makes a Dad
God took the strength of a mountain,
The majesty of a tree,
The warmth of a summer sun,
The calm of a quiet sea,
The generous soul of nature,
The comforting arm of night,
The wisdom of the ages,
The power of the eagle’s flight,
The joy of a morning in spring,
The faith of a mustard seed,
The patience of eternity,
The depth of a family need,
Then God combined these qualities,
When there was nothing more to add,
He knew His masterpiece was complete,
And so, He called it … Dad
Author Unknown

Treat your husband or father to a special day.  Either a day of golf, sleeping in, Sunday Brunch, or just a hug.  They deserve it.

I am finding that four years old is really the new “terrible two”.  My daughter has turned into a kid that loves to “talk back”, say “no”, “I don’t want to” and “I am not going to”.  Where did that sweet timid girl go?

Today we were at the water park.  She decided that she didn’t want to stay anymore.  Without saying anything, she walked off.  I thought she was going to the other play structure where the older kids were.  NOPE!  She kept walking down a long, long field. 

Natara!  Natara!, I shout……nothing.

NATARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  ……  She looks back at me in spite and then turns around and keeps on walking. 

I ran off, with my little 20 month old in sight, and grabbed Natara.  I ask, “Where are you going?”.

“I am going home” she replies.

“And how do you intend to get there if I am not ready to leave and you don’t have mommy to drive you?” I ask.

“With a stranger”, she replies.

My heart sank to the pit of my stomach as I realize that everything I have taught her is for nothing.  “WHAT???????”. 

I grabbed her by the arm as she is fighting with me “I don’t want to play.  I want to go home!!!!”.  I dragged her back to that picnic blanket and told her to sit there until we were ready to go.

I ofcourse proceeded to have the “don’t go with strangers talk” once again.  I just couldn’t believe my little girl would say something so awful.  And then to my despair, my little one took a nice #2 load in her “swimming diapers” which have the absorbancy of tissue paper.  All in all, a really fun day.

Guard your kids close, because they can disappear in the blink of an eye.

Recently I have noticed that my oldest daughter Natara is really interested in “growing things”.  She learns all about growing flowers and vegetables in daycare.  Also, last year, my neighbours always had an abundance of fresh produce from their back yards and I was running to the market for fresh vegetables for supper.  I thought, wow…that would be nice.

This year I decided it was time to start a garden.  My oldest daughter Natara was thrilled to see all the worms as we dug up the dirt.  She is also very fascinated that if you water seeds, they grow into plants.  Two weeks ago we started our garden complete with lettuce, broccoli, tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, beans, peas, squash, peppers, basil, and pumpkins.  Natara and I are very excited to see how things grow.  Lastnight we notice that our beans and peas are starting to sprout.  It is very fufilling to see something you started from seed, growing into something you can potentially eat.

I am so happy I started this project with my daughter.  Not only is it great bonding time for the two of us, it is a great learning experience for her, as well as a sense of responsibility having something to care for.

If you have the time, the energy, the room and the interest, you should definitely start a garden.

Life is like a garden, so DIG it!!!!!…….author unknown.

This post is a very sad one.  It is one that I think needs to be posted.  It is for the mothers who have suffered perinatal loss. 

I think there is nothing more traumatizing and devastating than the loss of a child.  In fact, just the very thought of it make me want to cry my eyes out.  The reason why I am writing this, because I have been thinking of this a lot lately.  My friend recently lost her full term baby.  She was ready to deliver and her baby was born without a heartbeat. 

I guess I want to write this post to acknowledge the incredible strength these women have.  I myself don’t have this and hope to god I never have to find the strength somewhere.  Once a fetus is 20 weeks, the parents have to deliver the baby.  What should have been a fabulous, miraculous experience, has now turned into something so devastating and heartbreaking.   They have to find the strength within to hold their baby (if they wish), they can have pictures done, and footprints done for keepsakes.  They have to say goodbye to the miracle that was created within their womb, that they nourished inside of them for numerous months.  They have already created such a bond with this baby, and now they have to find the strength to say goodbye.

If that wasn’t enough; the parents then have to plan their baby’s funeral.  How can this happen?  Why does this happen?  I guess we won’t really get the answer.  All I know, is that I think that having to go through this would be the worst, most unbearable pain ever.  I think the strongest of people are the mothers and fathers that have to survive through this.

My goal is not to depress you in any way.  It is to raise awareness that this does happen.  I work in a hospital and I see it happening on a regular basis.  People always talk about the happy moments of childbirth, but nobody ever mentions the people that prevail through the most difficult times.

Give a special hug and kiss to your little one and realize that you are blessed.  For those who have lost their little angels, know that you are not alone and that you have support around you.

This post is dedicated to the memory of Maya.  May she watch over her parents, brother and sister.

Natara had her follow-up appointment with the eye doctor to see if the glasses were working.  In only two short months, her eyesight is almost equal now with her glasses on.  Thankfully, Natara doesn’t need to move to a patch now because the glasses are improving her eyesight.

The next three years are crucial and she needs to wear those glasses 24/7.  I am so thrilled that we are seeing improvements and she loves wearing those glasses because she “looks like mommy” and she is “growing up”.

Keep up the good work baby girl!!!!

Time can be beautiful.  You watch your life around you develop into something so spectacular beyond your wildest dreams.  You develop as a person, and with your spouse and family; you evolve together into a stronger sense of being.

However, time can also be very challenging; especially when you feel you don’t have enough of it.  Am I alone out there?  I feel like I just don’t have enough time at all to do anything.  I have a “to do list” about two miles long.  I have piles of laundry waiting to be done because nobody has time to fold them.  I spend everyday trying to get my house organized; only to have a tornado of toys storm through it an hour later.

I have a pool full of algae, a garden full of weeds, and a lawn that needs to be mowed.  I have clothes I need to sift through, a new bbq that needs to be put together, and I have to somehow make time to practice fine motor skills with my oldest daughter.

I just wish sometimes there were more hours in the day to get everything accomplished.  I am in no way a control freak, but I do like a certain amount of order in my house to feel satisfied. 

To make matters worse, I really want to try and start exercising.  I just want to feel energized.  But when do I find the time between work, work at home, and spending quality time with the family?  Now thats a great question.

My oldest daughter will be starting school in the fall and it feels like just yesterday I gave birth to her.  Where does the time go?  I can now see why mothers cry as they send their babies off to school.  It is such an overwhelming experience as you go through the motions of everyday life while time passes you by.

Having said this, after ranting and feeling so overwhelmed by lack of time to finish everything in;  I can rest easy in knowing that I have spent the majority of my time with my family; watching my children grow up and putting my family first.  Yes, my house is a mess and I am sure the neighbours think I am lazy.  However, I am sure other parents feel the same sense of time constraints from time to time.

Cherish each moment you have with your family and for yourself.  Even though it is frustrating, chores can go on the back burner.  After twenty years have flown you by, you will only remember the quality times and not the chores.

I recently came to find out that my four year old daughter needed eye glasses.  I didn’t see any signs that she needed them, I was totally oblivious.  My husband came home one day and told me his eye doctor thought he should have his daughter’s eyes checked because apparently he had some genetic condition  that she could inherit from him. 

Genetic condition??????  I had no idea of this.  My husband doesn’t even wear glasses.  Where did this come from.  I was always planning on taking my daughter before she started school to get her eyes checked, but I never would have dreamed she would have inherited some “genetic condition”.

I brought her in to the eye doctor.  Sure enough, when the doctor put the eye patch on one of her eyes, she couldn’t see anything.  It was the most pitiful “I don’t see anything” response that made me want to cry myself.

As it turns out, my daughter has a “lazy eye”.  She now has to wear glasses 24/7.  Apparently with this type of condition, it needs to be caught when the child is very young, if there is any hope of helping the problem.  When I asked why my husband doesn’t wear glasses, apparently it is because he didn’t get the problem looked into early enough, and it was too late.  The eye doctor then proceeded to tell me that his one eye is so bad, that if something were to happen to the “good eye” he would be legally blind and lose his driver’s licence.  WHAT??????  How did I not know this?????

If my daughter’s eye glasses do not work, she will need to start wearing an eye patch on ther “good eye” to strengthen her “weak eye”.  I really hope it doesn’t come to this because kids can be cruel at times.  I felt like a really horrible mother for not seeing that my daughter had an eye problem.  Wouldn’t I notice???  However, the eye doctor reassured me that I wouldn’t have noticed because the “good eye” compensates for the “lazy eye”.

Keeping eye glasses on a 4 year old is very challenging.  Especially when you have an 18 month old in the house who loves to rip them off her face.  I have already had to bring the glasses back to the store twice in two weeks to get fixed.  While I was there, there was a mom of 4 kids there, and her son was on his 7th pair of eyeglasses in 2 years.  Yikes, $$$$$$$$ is all I can say.

One thing I have to say, she looks sooo cute with glasses.  And the best thing is, she says “Mommy I get to wear glasses just like you”. 

If there are 2 things you take away from reading this blog post:

1.  PLEASE, HAVE YOUR KIDS EYES CHECKED BEFORE SCHOOL.  Even though you don’t see a problem, there still could be one and if there is a chance that you can fix a problem if caught early, you should do everything you can.

2.  TALK to your spouse.  Obviously there was some lack of communication when I have been with my husband now for 11 1/2 years in total and have only just found out he has a genetic eye problem. 

May Your Eyes See All The Beauty In The World

Every year around this time I trudge out into the snow with the family all dressed up as we make our way into a portrait studio right around rush hour.  I choose this time because the weekend appointments book up so fast and I need to have a time that the whole family can be there.  Unfortunately, right before dinner is a really crummy time.  Everyone is tired and hungry.  The kids woke up from their nap and I was in a mad rush trying to give them a snack, cleaning them off, and getting them into pretty dresses, doing their hair, and then getting them into their snowsuits.  Phew…oh yeah, I have to look presenatable too.

We get there late as usual and as you can imagine with a three year old and a one year old, it is very difficult to get one great shot.  I am seen behind the camera jumping up and down like a manic person getting out of breath trying to get the kids to smile.  Our family shot looked “okay”.  My oldest daughter had a glazed look over her eyes and my youngest wasn’t really looking at the camera.  The shot of the two girls looked “okay” as well.  My oldest had a fake smile on and my youngest was looking at the camera but not smiling.  What are you going to do?  They have nice dresses at least.

Every year I tell my husband I am not going through the drama again.  Every year we say that next year we are going to do something candid from our camera and make our own Christmas Cards.  However, every year we go through the same rushed ordeal for a “okay” turnout. 

Tis the season for the rush!

As you all know I have had quite the hair ordeal this week in which the hairdresser turned it grey.  Well, it seems like it is fixed now but I still don’t really like it 100%.  I really can’t afford to colour it again and I really don’t want to fry it either. 

Today I took my kids to a Parent-Child Literacy Program we always go to.  I find the facilitator of the program very critical.  She always makes comments about how my daughter’s speech is behind, or because my other daughter isn’t walking yet, etc.  If its not one thing its another.  As you know, every child develops differently and you don’t need added criticism by someone who thinks they know everything.

Today she made a comment about how I got my hair done.  It was obvious that she didn’t like what she saw.  I said, “do you like it?” she responds with “well, I am not sure yet.  It is so different from your usual”.  Okay, well I guess in not so many words she hates it. I just think its rude to tell someone this and make them feel worse about themselves.  If someone asked me, I would respond with “you always look beautiful”.  However, I find that women have a nasty habit of putting each other down and talking about each other behind their backs.

From a very young age, I have always enjoyed the company of boys/men.  Its not because I am a tomboy, because I am definitely not.  I love being a girl and have always been into barbies, hair, etc.  I just feel like women can be so cut-throat with one another, where men don’t hurt you or don’t backstab you, they are just there for you. 

A friend is there for you when you are not at your best.  They don’t ask for anything in return, they are just there.

One thing that is very important to me is accountability.  If you make a mistake, you recognize it and are accountable for your actions.  In turn, you accect the consequences for your actions.  I teach this to my children on a daily basis, so that they know that it is important to be responsible for your actions.  Hitting, shoving, yelling, etc is unacceptable. 

Yesterday I went and got my hair “fixed”.  However, I was disgusted by the way I was treated.  There was no accountability, no remorse.  They turned my hair GREY!!!!  I walked in yesterday and the same girl went to fix it.  However, she kept saying she did a good job and that it was my hair type, because I have some “ash” colour in my hair naturally that it turned grey.  Then the girls proceeded to tell me that “Some people go for that look so we don’t know what you like”.  Excuse me????  When they initally did my hair I asked three different hair dressers if it looked grey because I didn’t like it.  All of them said “no”. 

The girl put me under the water, bleached out the grey.  My hair is fried and I am still not totally happy with my hair.  Unfortunately, I can’t keep frying it either or I will have no hair left.  Then the girl started brushing my hair so hard that I thought my hair follicles were going to rip out of my scalp.  When she put on the water, she put it at a scalding hot section.  I thought to myself “You think you can hurt me, I’ll show you, I am one tough chick”.  She eventually said, “Is this too hot” and I replied “a little”.

After it was repaired I asked them to blow dry it straight like it was intially the day before when I paid them $150 for the colour, cut and blow dry.  Then they decide to tell me after the fact that they were charging me $30 for the blow dry.  I was fuming and I am still fuming.  I was obviously unhappy at the start but they decided to ignore the problem.  Then when I went back, they told me it was my hair type and colour and not the hair dresser’s responsibility to know what colours go with certain hair types.  They also said I should have stuck with my usual girl.  What terrible customer service.

I have been going to my regular girl for years, and I have never had a problem.  Unfortunately, she is on maternity leave.  I guess the moral of the story is to stay with what works.  If its not broken, don’t try and fix it.